Puking Dog

Guy "pretends" to rob mom... she shoots him with a .357

 Police are questioning whether he was pretending.  Mommy wasn't!  [Journal Sentinel]

Man cited for 'rocking out' to John Denver

 This guy didn't answer the door until the police learned his name from a neighbor and called for him to answer personally.  Said he was "rocking out." Yawn.  [Fond du Lac Reporter] 

Dude stabs a guy on Christmas "to see what it felt like."

 Insert "refused to take his meds" excuse here. [Star Tribune]

Drunk Santa stumbles around asking kids for his reindeer

 Police chief, master of the obvious, says: "I believe his level of intoxication probably impaired his judgment."  Probably.  [WEAU]

Man gets jail for peeing on back of cop's head

 Well... it was his 5th drunk driving arrest... [Sheboygan Press]

Grab-assing results in shooting outside of bar

 Really... girl grabs a guy's butt; it went down hill from there.  Nice neck tat though.  [Journal Sentinel]

Bank robber arrives 6 minutes too late

 Made a clean getaway though... so, he's got that going for him.  [York Daily Record]

Muggers apologize to victim after finding military ID

The bad guys even thanked the vet.  Happy Veteran's Day! [Associated Press via Google] 

If you don't roll down the window during a drive by shooting...

you're doing it wrong.  [Post Crescent.com]

Guy claims last nights Jack Daniels steak made him blow a .07

Interestingly, he was on his way into his court-ordered drunk driver class when they nabbed him.  [Sheboygan Press]