Puking Dog

Man knifes daughter's cheek for not doing homework

Say it with me: "Some people shouldn't be allowed to reproduce."  This moron needs a knife in his cheek.  [Delaware Online]

Guy thwarts the repo man--drives off as car is being towed

Percy Stultz, 37, of Laurel, DE spotted a repo man trying to repossess his crunk 2003 Mazda Tribute at 12:30 a.m. this morning and said "uh uh, honey!"  Percy raced out of his house, hopped in the car, which was already chained to the repo man's tow truck, jammed the car in reverse and sped off.   Percy's still on the loose.  An arrest warrant has been issued charging him with one misdemeanor count of reckless endangering.  [Delaware Online]

Numbskull wastes her life and everyone else's time fighting a $100 speeding ticket

Christine Downs, 24, of Dover, DE got a $100 ticket for going 44 mph in a 25 mph zone.  She demanded a jury trial and represented herself.  In court, she read from a list of 96 questions, filed motions, raised objections and cross examined local police officers about their experience, training, work schedules, the radar technology used to determine her speed, weather conditions, traffic flow and their knowledge about law as it pertains to speed... for over an hour, but was still found guilty. She appealed to the state Supreme Court... and lost again.  I guess she had nothing better to do... Oh, I almost forgot, after the officer gave her the speeding ticket, she sped off, so he pulled her over again.. and gave her a warning.[Seacoast Online]

Woman declared dead comes back to life to sue doctors

Louis Johnson, of Delaware, brought his wife, Judith, to the emergency room for what they thought was a bad case of indigestion.  About an hour later, doctors took him into a room to tell him his wife was dead.  While at the hospital morgue, someone noticed that Judy was breathing... even with a tube still in her throat.  Judy is brain-injured, but can walk and talk... and "suffers from liver damage, chest pain, memory loss, speech problems, seizures, a change in personality and permanent neurological injury as a result of what happened."  She wants compensatory and punitive damages.  The doctors maintain that she didn't have a pulse and was therefore "dead,"  but may have experienced spontaneous return of circulation, otherwise known as "Lazarus syndrome," and come back to life.  Huh... who knew?  [Delaware Online]

Man crashes truck while trying to roll a joint

Shawn Jones, 24, of Newark, DE swerved his pickup truck across a two-lane road, ran off the road, hit several street signs, nearly hit a utility pole, then drove back across the road again before stopping because his tires were flat and fluid was leaking from his car.  Oh, he ignored the policeman chasing him and telling him to pull over.  Shawn told the arresting officer that he was trying to roll a joint as he was driving.  Police found a partially rolled cigarette and 43 oxycodone pills inside the pickup.  [Delaware Online]