Puking Dog

Secretary of the year calls in bomb threat so boss doesn't miss plane

 She also sent a follow-up bomb threat via email, so you know she's on top of things.  [Miami Herald]

Police say man steals $84 worth of deoderant to pay drug debt

 This mastermind has "THUG LIFE" tattooed on his chest.  Momma's proud, I'm sure.  [TampaBay.com]

Dog has 130 nails for dinner...

 “I counted about 130, but I don't know how many she threw up before she was taken, so it could've been more.”  What did you eat today?  [News4Jax]

Eye docto tells lady she's a mess....

Might lose his license for telling her she's a fat drain on the system.  [News Observer] 

Police officer suspended for shooting 12-year-old girl with bean bag

With video...  [Oregon Live.com]

Nostradamus ends Judas Priest listening streak at 534 days

All good things must come to an end... [Cleveland.com]

2-year-old rushed to hospital after finding religion

Kind of... he fell into the baptismal pool while his parents were probably doing more important things than watching him.  [al.com]

County out $14k for toilet paper injury

It seems a custodian injured her back picking ass wipe off the floor... twice!  [Chicago Sun Times]

Guy who was tasered on his butt sues city

 
Apparently, a police officer used a taser on him twice and threatened to use it in his anus and on his genitals during the arrest... [Idaho Statesman]

Man throws darts at bar patrons....

and poops in the parking lot on the way out.  Sure doesn't look like the type to me. Maybe alcohol played a roll?  [TC Palm]