Puking Dog

Freshman eats pig balls in science class on a dare...

He indicated that he "didn't bite down" and that it was "just like swallowing a pill."  They make 'em smart in Texas.  His parents must be proud.  [Dallas Morning News]

Krispy Kreme accosed of clogging... city's sewers

Apparently, these fat pills don't just clog your arteries!  The city wants $1.9M from the grease vendor to scraps all the gunk out.  [CBC]

82 Year Old Tough Guy

When you’re tough, you’re tough.  And age doesn’t matter, at least not with this bully.  So if you are running errands this weekend and encounter an aged man demanding your filled-with-goodies, eco-friendly Trader Joe’s grocery bag – you better do it.  And if he asks you to jump, respond with “How high?”  And if he asks you to empty the dishwasher, save yourself the strangulation by asking for the proper technique... Article

Man has at least 21 children with 11 mothers

Key-ripes...  Dude got a minimum wage job so some of these women get $1.98 a month in child support.  [WTSP]

Melvindale woman to be arraigned in dad's stabbing death

Ever wake-up in the morning and want to take a quick roll?  No, no, no - not a roll in the sack.  That urge can be justified; just asked all the Catholic priests that tried celibacy.  This story is much sadder – Family, Murder, Desire, maybe Jealousy, and best of all... a Dinner Roll.  Article 

River Falls, Wis. / Son locks his allegedly drunk dad out of car

Where does common sense trump blood-ties?  In River Falls, Wisconsin, where the youth know when to say No.  No dad!  Bad dad!  You stay outside!  What would you do if you're incoherent, probably drunk dad drove you home while pursued by police?  Article

5 shot, 1 killed... and it all started when dog killed cat

Here's how it allegedly happened:  Some yokel's dog killed his neighbor’s cat. The neighbor then shot the dog, prompting the dog’s owner to shoot his 50-year-old neighbor and, because it's North Carolina and we aren't dealing with the pointy end of the stick here, the neighbor's 8-year-old daughter.  [News14]

Fake no parking signs gets city $4,000+ in parking fines

Some developer installed the signs... the local cops just wrote the tickets (and didn't bother to check if the signs were real).  [Tampa Bay.com]

IRS contractor charged with elevator peeing

Authorities say this guy repeatedly squatted in the elevator... and it took $4,626 to get rid of the stank.  [Detroit Free Press]

WTF? 14 cars damaged in stripping game

Apparently, these yeahoos stood on a highway overpass and threw rocks at cars.  Hit a headlight, take off a layer of clothes.  The cops found them in their underware.  [Seattle Times]