Oh... she was sentenced a month earlier for killing her boyfriend while driving drunk. The sad part is this genius is gonna reproduce some day. [Buffalo News]
She couldn't find a parking space... soo.... she drive through the parade. She's being held on assault with a deadly weapon charges after ALMOST squashing folks. [Fox News]
This guy didn't answer the door until the police learned his name from a neighbor and called for him to answer personally. Said he was "rocking out." Yawn. [Fond du Lac Reporter]
This guy wants to turn his house into a duplex... plus operate home occupations that involve music lessons, scheduling musical performances and a Jewish sperm bank. Wait, what?? [KnoxNews]
"Market research showed us that younger Canadians and women were very very unlikely to ever buy a magazine called The Beaver no matter what it's about." Huh... who knew? [Reuters]
Best parts: This dude was seen eyeballing an $80 hunk of beef then "it was gone and a large bulk appeared on his person." The guy claims he was just "massaging" the meat." [Times and Democrat]
Sue Ann was taking a pole dancing class at Crunch when she fell off the pole. Maybe it's the "gimme gimme, me first!" culture of New York, maybe it's because her name is Sue Ann... regardless, she wants paid. [WTSP.com]